Chief Mills “Believe me if I could find a way to make this not look bad I would”

If you see violent crime getting worse in Eureka, then don’t believe your lyin’ eyes; at least that’s what the devious Police Chief Andy Mills would like you to do. As reported by the Lost Coast Outpost, “EPD: Despite High Murder Rate, Violent Crime Way down in Eureka”:

(“Believe me, if I could find away to make this not look bad I would” *recorded quote from Police Chief Andy Mills on KINS radio AM News 1-20-15.)


crime wave

Now, let’s take a sober look the reported statistics…Murder is way up…..Rape is way up…Robbery is up….but “Assaults with a Deadly Weapon” (ADW) are down. Not just down, but slashed in half! (A statistical improbability in light of the rest of the stats). EPD made it very clear that because reported ADW’s are down by about 50%, that it means overall violent crime is on the decline this past year. (now pay close attention) The Chief even made it clear that EPD was making sure to file every ADW report under the “correct” classification:

“Earlier, EPD Chief Andy Mills told the Outpost that he is confident in the statistics. The categories of crime are defined by the FBI’s Uniform Crime Reports program, and they are not very flexible. If an officer responds to a call and the details of the incident match the parameters laid out by the FBI, then it will be counted among the total. Those parameters change very little from year to year.”

Chief Mills is good….Very good (slick). He has made a broad statement that nothing has changed with EPD’s reporting, and that because of the tight parameters there’s no room to fudge the numbers for the FBI statistics.

However, many sources in the department have told us that reporting has changed within EPD. Not so much a policy change, but a definite change in practice. In the past, if someone purposely hit a citizen with a vehicle then that would be classified as an assault with a deadly weapon (a 2000 lb car is an obvious weapon in that manner). Also, in the past, if someone tried to hit a citizen with a baseball bat, but missed, then the report would be reflected in the ADW stats (These days they probably will not take a report, but instead offer you a worthless “documentation” number). In fact, there was a time in this city that a person trained in martial arts who hit a grandmother in the face with his fist might be charged with “Assault with a deadly weapon”. Would that happen under Chief Mill’s new Statistical Model? Most likely not.

The fact is that Mills wants you to suspend your disbelief and just trust in their reported statistics. Even when those statistics show that you were more likely to get killed, raped or robbed in Eureka in 2014, than you were in 2013. It seems from the outside like an unorganized revolt is starting with individual officers breaking ranks. Some are expressing their dissatisfaction to friends and some are finding ways to get the word to us. For the well being and safety of the town we can only hope it grows.

Note to Eureka City Manager Greg Sparks;

You’ve got two big problems that your Police Chief is responsible for:

  1. The growing Crime Wave sweeping the City which started under Murl Harpham.
  2. The lame attempt at a cover up of the Crime Wave sweeping the City.

Time for a “come to Jesus” talk with your Chief


12 thoughts on “Chief Mills “Believe me if I could find a way to make this not look bad I would”

  1. We believe you Chief. This time.


  2. There seems to be a big effort by all the local police to harass the homeless/drunk in public population instead of dealing with real criminals. Every day there are at least a half dozen drunk in public arrests. Obviously, this effort takes police away from dealing with more serious offenders. I have a difficult time believing the homeless/dup crowd is responsible for the murder/violent crime increase.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. “There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.”. Mr. Twains words stil ring true today.


  4. Eureka needs to put this guy on the “trade block” maybe we could get a first round draft pick


  5. Excellent analysis. I would add one more: Domestic Violence. Many of these can and should be charged as an ADW (remember as you pointed out, there is no “success/injury” requirement to make an ADW stick, and you can use your hands under the law, that is still a subset of ADW.) It used to be that all ADWs were inside the same section. About 2 years ago, that changed. For example the “Force Likely” using your hands section is now 245(a)(4). This was a good change, since sometimes weapons involve make it a strike, where force likely is not a strike. If every other type of violent crime is up, there is no way that ADWs are way down. Someone is cooking the books.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Absolutely. It’s hard to fudge the numbers on rape and murder, but the “ADW” seems to be the one area that has some “wiggle” room. Looks like EPD has been doing a lot of wiggling.

      Liked by 2 people

  6. This doesn’t even tell the story of all the “no shows” when the police are called. Also the home invasions at gun point where the cops show up three days later and talk the victim out of filing a report.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. President of the United States said crime is lower than ever last night. Maybe he is part of the devious conspiracy you are referring to?


    • bolithio:

      If you are talking about Fox News… then yes Mr. Obama is the center of many dark conspiracies. I think the featured dark conspiracy this week is the Muslims are taking over America with the help of their Muslim U.S. President’s help.

      But in this very specific case… Mr. Obama was speaking of national trends.

      Alas… our local trends are a different matter.

      But that’s always the case…. As the Nation goes, so does not Humboldt go.

      But you raise a good point… Is Chief Mill’s effort at creating fantasy through numbers a “conspiracy”, or just a desperate effort to “put lipstick on the pig”?

      Credibility is the name of the game… Where is Chief Mill’s credibility to be found?


    • Bolithio seems to have missed the point. Crime is generally down most places, except Eureka. Mills is trying to cover this community failure up.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Pingback: Tuluwat Examiner | Quarterly Report: Same old, same old BS from the Police Chief

  9. Pingback: Tuluwat Examiner | Will the real Chief Mills Please Stand Up?

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